Thursday, July 1, 2010

Letting Go...

People say that "saying goodbye is really hard and painful".
Well, I guess it is. 
After saying goodbye, I still had the urge to go back again...
Back to the status quo...
Back to where things were where they were...
but things change and I guess I'm just one who reacts very badly to changes.
Once in a while I've got this tinge of sadness when I think about those memories...
It's really hard to let go..

However, now that I finally have..
Finally learned to move on and do what I'm suppose to do...
I feel like I no longer wanna return...
or maybe I do... but just not as badly as I wanted before.
Perhaps I no longer feel like I belong there.
Perhaps I do but I just don't feel welcomed.
Or maybe I'm afraid of another goodbye...
afraid that once I go back I'd be reluctant to leave again.
Perhaps its these thoughts that now I feel kinda "drifted"
I feel like "I've let go and this is it...don't think about it anymore"...



I'm afraid.. 
that what I used to love will drift away from me...
that what I used to think was so important to me was just an illusion
or perhaps they're just not as great as I thought they were.

Perhaps I mistook a piece of floating ice for an iceberg...
thinking that there was something  more to it than meets the eye.
I'm sorry I don't mean to doubt.

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